Janese Johnson

Smiles are so simple to do, yet they yield unbelievable results. Research has proven the importance of a smile on quite a few fronts. A smile can help your mood; affect your health; bring in greater and more rewarding friendships and opportunities; and be a universal language known by all.

You would think with all the benefits of a mere smile, we would be making them all of the time. Dr. William Fry has studied humor and smiling for over 20 years.

In one study it was noted that children around four years old smiled on an average of 400 times a day, whereas adults only smiled an average of 14 times a day.

These results are quite sad when we think about the difference between 400 smiles a day versus 14 smiles óespecially knowing the benefits that come from a smile.

Dr. Fry says, ìLaughter relieves stress and improves our immune system.î He says that when we laugh it is similar to an internal jog and that we are massaging our internal organs.

He suggests that since it is hard to manufacture a real belly laugh, a smile will help just as well because it gives signals to the brain that you are happy. This then leads to a more authentic happiness.

A leading author almost 70 years ago, Dale Carnegie, was well known for his books on how to influence people, build self-confidence and become successful. He believed in the power of the smile so much that he wrote a chapter on smiling in one of his books.

In his book How To Win Friends And Influence People, Carnegie calls smiling ìthe big secret in dealing with people.î He believed that people respond to smiles much more than not. When most people feel a warm and genuine smile, it helps them to trust you more and listen to what you have to say. Most people tend not to feel good around someone who is not warm and smiling.

When Carnegie talked about his ìbig secretî almost 70 years ago, most people never really had thought about it. Now there are quite a few teachings out there talking about the importance of a smile.

What I wonder is why are we smiling an average of only 14 times a day when we have been told for so long about smilesí benefits. Is it because we are so caught up in our own personal stress and pain that to fake a smile feels too phony?

I had an experience with smiling that helped me see the benefit if doing it even when I didnít feel like it. My family moved into a new neighborhood. The neighborhood had been very local until the ìoutsidersî started moving in. Not only were we outsiders, but we are also a racially mixed family.

The neighbor across the street saw us as a real threat and had no problem showing his contempt for the likes of us.

Every day that I saw him outside, which was often, I smiled and waved. He returned it with a look of contempt. I kept on waving and smiling for three years without ever expecting anything different. I was quite surprised after three years he started waving back. I never did get the smile, maybe I moved out too soon. That might have taken another three years. I learned that from that experience that I could have chose to respond with the same contempt back but instead I chose to smile. That smile helped him slowly change his attitude about us.

Smiles are a universal language that touches us no matter what language we speak or where we are from. We all know that when someone genuinely smiles, that they are approachable. Yes there are deceptive smiles, but I believe that our hearts know the difference from a deceptive smile and a genuine one. We can be in a foreign country not knowing the language at all, but a smile on anotherís face brings a warmth and communication to the heart.

The great news is that we can bring up to average smiles for adults by smiling more often. And by doing this practice of smiling, we can also reap the many benefits that come from this very simple and powerful action. So letís smile more, and make a real difference to ourselves and to others.